zaferia for president

Dear zaferia,

I have just read your blog. I stumbled upon it while I was looking for my friend's blog, and I don't believe in chance. I was captivated by your words. You are so precious and I just want you to know that you are loved. I wish that there were more words from you or that there was some way that I could contact you.

It is your voice that I've been hearing in my head. It's your heart that beats in the dark words that I write. It is your face that I can't quite see.

Oh, sweet sister, I am here with you.

In the Garden

Friday November 26, 2004 7:23pm

It was in the middle of another pitty party that I decided to focus on You. I didn't know why such an insignificant thing like which door in the movie theater to exit from bothered me so much.

I focused on You. Talked about me, cried about me, vented about me, and then all of a sudden, I was thinking about You. About how Your Birthday is coming up soon and how sad it is that most people will forget...

I thought about how that must hurt You. Then, I wondered what Your family did for your Birthday. How did they celebrate it? Did you get to choose your cake? dinner? game?

Then, somehow I started thinking about Adam and Eve - the first people to break Your heart.

You knew when they would do it. Were You standing behind a tree listening as Your creation betrayed You? How You must have longed to reach out and say, "Please don't."

Did You cry while You listened? Was Your voice just a little ragged as You said, "Adam, where are you?"

Was Your heart heavy as You gazed upon Adam, looking directly into his perfect, holy face for the last time? How did You lovingly caress Eve as You touched her body for the last time?

You knew when they went exploring that day that they, nor any of their offspring, would ever come back. Did Your hands linger in theirs just a little longer as you slowly let them go?